Skip to content

ADHD Task Avoidance, and Procrastivity

ADHD Task Avoidance, and Procrastivity
The Truth about women's mental health

Listen to Episode 21 Now on ADHD Task Avoidance, and Procrastivity!

In this episode we talk about ADHD and Task Avoidance and Procrastivity We are going to explore the 4 patterns of avoidance in ADHD. How to combat task avoidance and Procrastivity with techniques like RAIN, SMART goals and Chunking. Stick with us to the end because we are going to give you the steps to help keep yourself on track!!

Episode 21 ADHD and Task Avoidance

[00:00:00] Randi: 1, 2, 3, 4. Hi friends. It's Randy and Jess, and we're gonna cut the

[00:00:07] Jess: bullshit and let's get into women's mental health.

[00:00:13] Randi: Welcome to the podcast unapologetically All over the place with Randy and Jess. Two psychotherapists as we talk about women's mental health issues and how it's all normal.

[00:00:23] Jess: In this episode, we are gonna talk about A D H D and task avoidance and procrast.

[00:00:29] Randi: What is Procr? And that's a mouthful .

[00:00:32] Jess: It is. It is.

It's something I do all the time. So we're gonna also go into the four patterns of avoidance for ADHDers.

[00:00:40] Randi: Okay. How to combat task avoidance with techniques like, uh, RAIN SMART goals and chunking.

[00:00:47] Jess: And then stick with us to the end cuz we're gonna go ahead and give you some steps to help keep yourself on track

[00:00:52] Randi: and we all need them and Jess and I are the masters of not staying on track so.

Right. We are very good at finding out all this information cuz we try to implement it all the time.

[00:01:03] Jess: All the time. Okay. So have you ever. Why am I cleaning right now when I have taxes to do?

[00:01:09] Randi: What the heck was I just doing?

[00:01:11] Jess: Oh, damn. My ADHD got me again and now I did nothing that I was supposed to do.

[00:01:16] Randi: Uh, maybe I can get all these little things done, like all the things, all my lists, and I'll just feel a little bit better.

[00:01:22] Jess: Ooh, ooh. I know I'm gonna get my Christmas cards together right now cuz it's not. December instead of actually doing the pile of work that I'm supposed to be doing.

[00:01:32] Randi: Right. There's so many things that you can apply this to when you have ADHD or if you are just great at procrastinating,

[00:01:40] Jess: right? So, okay. Task avoidance. I, we're gonna break up procrasivity and task avoidance. Task avoidance is a series of like, thoughts, behaviors, um, that basical. Put us off doing like the task we're supposed to do,

[00:01:54] Randi: right? Like what we need to be doing, we're avoiding or should be doing. Um, we don't really want to do it, but it needs to be done. There's another thing we're gonna talk about, how we can cope with that and deal with the stress that comes with that.

[00:02:11] Jess: Well, task avoidance is, Form of coping. I mean, it is a poor coping skill, but it is a coping skill for like eliminating short-term stress. Okay. Most of us who do it ADHDers, yes. It's part of our, you know, executive dysfunctioning brain.

[00:02:27] Randi: Right. And this is actually like very technical actually is having a. Deficit in your executive function, which means when you have adhd, your brain does not think a certain way, and so you're at a deficit. Mm-hmm. , you just can sometimes not take the steps the everyday typical brain can take.

[00:02:50] Jess: Well, and sometimes these, these task avoidance happens because we want to be perfect.

Mm-hmm. or. We're afraid of feeling like a failure. Right. Right. So then we end up doing everything else, but that one thing.

[00:03:02] Randi: Yeah. And that's very common too with ADHD is like, uh, perfectionism. Mm-hmm. , and I do that too. Like, I'll be like, if I can't do this, like 120%, well I'm not gonna do it at all. And then it's like, wait, but it needs to get done.

[00:03:14] Jess: You're like, no, no, no, no. I'm gonna put it off. Or sometimes you're right. Not being able to finish something perfectly. Mm-hmm. , right. If I can't finish this, then I'm just gonna wait until the perfect time to make it perfect.

[00:03:24] Randi: Yeah. Or getting so overwhelmed that you just completely shut down, which is something that is very typical.

And that happens to me a lot too. Like I'll just be like, there's so much, and then I'm just like, okay, well I'm not gonna do any of it. And that doesn't get you anywhere either.

[00:03:39] Jess: I see that with my daughter doing homework. She just gets overwhelmed sometimes with the homework. Mm-hmm. . And then she's like, I can't do it.

And we're like, what do you mean you can't do it? Right? And she's like, no, no, I can't do it. And, and that's the shutdown. Me, I am huge at Progressivity. . That is my thing right there. Right. It is productive. Procrastination, right?

[00:03:59] Randi: So you're getting shit done and a lot of it, but it might not necessarily be important, important or in the order that it should be done. Like a long time ago, like somebody gave me a book and I read it and it's called like Eat That Frog. And it was about like doing the thing that you don't wanna.

First thing in the day to get out of the way. Yep. To kinda set the tone for your day. And I've always tried to carry that with me, but it's very, very, very hard to do when you have h adhd.

[00:04:30] Jess: And the thing about the progressivity is that it, it gives me like, not only did I get to chunk stuff off, it's a dopamine booster. Mm-hmm. , because I mean, as Randy's walking in, she's like, oh, check that out. Check that out. I'm organizing stuff in my house. Yeah.

[00:04:43] Randi: She's got little piles all over the place of different projects.

[00:04:45] Jess: I do. I've got all these projects started. But really I should be going through that whole pile for my taxes.

[00:04:50] Randi: Right? Because that's important. And it's like on the business side of things too, cuz I, you know, run a business. Is that learning to, um, I read that there's like, um, a $10,000 idea and a $10 idea.

Which one are you gonna do that's gonna yield the highest results for you? Like financially or like professionally, and like, which one is just like, you don't really need to be doing it.

And it's actually like probably taking away, and it's like with ADHD and task avoidance, you like to do all the little, like $5 and $10 because it feels good, it's easy to do and get out of the way, but you're, you're not putting effort into.

$10,000 or $10 million ideas or tasks that could really like, push you forward. And so it's kind of like, it's very hard. You have to learn how to flip your thinking. Mm-hmm. , so you're, you know, not being productive. Procrastination, .

[00:05:46] Jess: And again, that's when I joke that like, I'll be cleaning up my office and I'll go to the garage to put something away, and either my husband will find me reorganizing the screwdriver or, you know, drawer or, or you're, I'll be out in the garden, you know, doing something in the middle ofwinter.

[00:06:01] Randi: Right. Because you're getting instant gratification from that. Yep. And you know, you can a hundred percent complete that. It's not having like really any major impact. You might not have to think a bunch about it, so you're like, okay.

[00:06:14] Jess: It's also, uh, progressivity is also very hands-on. Mm-hmm. , it's a physical thing and so it's, I don't have to think when I'm organizing my medicine cabinet. Right, right. It's. Physical. And so that's where some of that dopamine comes from. Yeah. Because I can touch it, I can move it. I could see it look pretty.

[00:06:31] Randi: That's true. Yeah. And so that's the difference. So you're getting all those different senses filled.

[00:06:35] Jess: Yeah. Yes. So I am queen of that one.

[00:06:38] Randi: Like you said, like doing your taxes Oh is not like something, especially if you don't like numbers, you know, and it's like a stress and it's like a law there's like all these things that you feel like you have to uphold doing it, and it's just like, mm.

[00:06:52] Jess: Well, and. I'm gonna u keep using the taxes because what that is, is I'm just putting stuff where it needs to be and it's not finished until like February. Right. When I send it off to my person.

[00:07:03] Randi: Yeah. So you're not getting that instant, it's like a long haul, like a long game, you know?

Yeah. And it's like hard because you can't see the end of it, the end reward with it,

[00:07:13] Jess: and half the time I have to pay so it doesn't feel

[00:07:15] Randi: good. Right. So, and with ADHD we like, we're good with rewards and consequences, especially rewards. Instant. Yeah. And so when we are not seeing like there's a reward, and like you said at the end, there's a consequence you have to pay your taxes. You're like, Hmm, do I wanna do that? No, let's put that off as long as possible.

[00:07:34] Jess: Meanwhile, I'm gonna go make my, uh, glitter ornaments for Christmas. Right. Because, you know, those are pretty and shiny. Yeah. So there are four different patterns of avoidance with people with adhd, which I thought was really interesting, right? That is Dr. Rostain, uh, came up with four different types of avoidance. First one, I can't say it. You do it.

[00:07:54] Randi: Anticipatory avoidance. Ooh. Do that again. Anticipatory avoidance, it means that you amplify the difficulty of an upcoming tasks and you start to have like doubts and like, probably like racing thoughts like that, you will not be able to probably complete the tasks.

So you rationalize and justify why you're procrastinating. So you're like, oh shit. Like I'm not gonna be able to do this. Like, this is gonna be so hard, like, uh, like I'm not gonna get the result I want. And so then you're just like, yeah, so it's okay. I'm putting it.

[00:08:26] Jess: Right. I don't have enough time for that.

Right. So I'm gonna save for when I do, which is I never wanna do it. So

[00:08:32] Randi: it's putting off the immediate stress of it, like you said. So it's like a coping almost. But then you're creating this, you know, kind of self-fulfilling prophecy that it was gonna be so overwhelming and you were never gonna be able to complete it, or is gonna be so stressful and like you don't really know.

[00:08:49] Jess: That was me in college, grad school, right? Mm-hmm. , like that paper was gonna take so long. Oh my gosh. Oh my gosh. Did I wait till the night before? Pulled it all nighter. It was horrible. Well, it was horrible because I made it horrible. Right. Waiting till the last freaking minute. Yeah. And having to stay up all night to finish it.

[00:09:05] Randi: Yeah. And then we come almost addicted to that stress cycle though too. Yeah. Because we learn to live off of that and then our body, like we don't know how to deal without it. So, I mean, and that's very common in college and especially with us who are diagnosed later in life. .

Like as women, that becomes almost like a coping skill for us, and we just, that becomes our normal

[00:09:25] Jess: Well, and that's what he calls number two, which is brinkmanship. Right. That means you wait to the last possible moment before doing something or completing something, right? Mm-hmm. , especially stuff if you don't like doing it. I mean that, that right there

[00:09:39] Randi: mm-hmm. especially for kids and stuff like that. Or like you said, like that paper for school or it's like studying.

Studying or things like that. And like I used to be like, oh yeah, that's my superpower, that I can like get everything done at the last minute. You know? And it was like, that wasn't probably really a good tool to have .

[00:09:57] Jess: Well, because you feel like it helps you focus, right? Right. How, however, that stress and pressure that comes from the brinkmanship, it's, you know, it's very.

Not worth Very, not worth it. Yes. It's very not worth it. Worth it.

[00:10:10] Randi: That is technical. Very not worth it. Very not worth it. But um, but yeah, another thing to note is that like there's. Hardly any room for error when you're in that, because you don't give yourself time to like go back and like check your work or like make sure like, you know, do another like draft or whatever it is.

Mm-hmm. , it's just like, everything's like last minute and so sometimes that can create like more anxiety and puts you under more pressure to perform and you might feel good at the end of it, but probably the whole process leaning up to that timeframe where you were like stressing and cycling, you're not feeling very good.

[00:10:45] Jess: Number three is pseudo efficiency, which is kind of like my procrastinate, procrast, right? Mm-hmm. , where it's the act of completing several easy, low priority things. So I can avoid that big thing. Mm-hmm. . But it feels good cuz I can check shit off.

[00:11:01] Randi: Well this is me and I still hand write out lists. So I can like write it off and physically be like, oh, I did it. I did it. I did it. And oftentimes I will put all the smaller stuff up at the top. Yes. Or if I've already done it, I'll write it on there and cross it off. So I feel like I got something done and it's like, why am I doing this?

[00:11:19] Jess: Well, and that's usually when we feel overwhelmed, right? We put all the little things on there, um, so that way we can cross it off and it feels good.

[00:11:27] Randi: Oh, and like this, it said like avoiding e like with email and social media checking things. I'm just gonna check, do you know how long they say you waste checking your email? It takes, when you go to check just one email, it can take you 26 minutes to get back on task. Wow. That is a lot of wasted time.

And they were saying like, we check our email. X amount of times a day. I can't remember. It was like, I don't even know, like five times a day. So five times a day you're checking your email and it's taking you 26 plus minutes to get back on task. So what I've done like professionally too, is like I mute my emails yes. And I only check it once a day.

[00:12:03] Jess: I check mine more than that, but I every, I don't have any notifications.

Yeah. No, I don't have anything. I have to actually go and look for it and I try to do it maybe once or twice a day, depending. Mm-hmm. , I mean, usually there's nothing major crisis or they'll call. The other one I'm also notorious for doing is what he calls juggling. Right? Mm-hmm. , you take on multiple things at once.

[00:12:25] Randi: Oh, yeah. Yeah. Dunno how to say no to things , right.

[00:12:28] Jess: You know? And it's extremely popular with people with adhd. Yeah. Because that new task gives you the dopamine rush. We love

[00:12:36] Randi: our dopamine Well, yeah. And Justin and I love doing this too, we're always like, oh, we got a great idea for this. Oh, let's do this. Oh, let's host this.

Oh, let's throw a party for.

[00:12:44] Jess: Right, and the next thing you know, we're like, why did we say yes to all that? Why do we create that? We did that ,

[00:12:49] Randi: because you feel excited and motivated, but then you can get so overwhelmed because you have so much going on at the same time. So it's important to learn. With yourself too.

Like boundaries.

[00:13:02] Jess: Exactly. Boundaries, yeah. With yourself.

[00:13:04] Randi: Right. And also like this can kind of lead to like half-assing like a lot of things too, because it's like you have like so many, what do they say? Like sticks in the fire, irons in the fire and like, so it's like you can't tend to like certain things like fully because your attention is divided all over the place.

[00:13:21] Jess: Right. And you're like, no, no, no. But I can tell I can, I can do all of it.

[00:13:23] Randi: Yeah. So how do we. This, how do we cope with this? What kind of skills do we need to kind of combat this?

[00:13:29] Jess: So there are three, um, that I like to teach and, and use. Uh, the first one is rain, uh, created by Tara. Tara Brack. Br, I think is what her name?

Brock. Brock. And it's basically mindfulness, right? Because first of all, you have to be mindful of what is happening. Mm-hmm. . So you can catch it. You wanna run us through the acronym of rain?

[00:13:47] Randi: Sure. Rain. R recognize A allow I investigate. And n nurture. So what that stands for is recognizing what is happening.

That's the R Like notice your emotions, what's happening like we talked about in a previous episode. Uh, learning your warning signs like physical. Mm-hmm. emotional. Mm-hmm. , um, your triggers and what is the task that you're trying to avoid. And then a is allow, and what does that go into?

[00:14:15] Jess: What that goes into is, and I'm just gonna laugh if y'all can hear the puppy in the background.

No. And he is just having so much fun. Okay. So what that allowing the experience to be there is, is really is don't trying like, I guess don't change the feelings. Mm. Just be very present with whatever it is that you're feeling. Even if it's uncomfortable. Yeah. Because you have to recognize what is bringing this up.

And then that leads to end, which is nurture yourself. I mean, we, well,

[00:14:40] Randi: no.

[00:14:42] Jess: Did I skip? See, I can't spell. I can't spell. I, I'm gonna ran and not rain.

[00:14:46] Randi: She's gonna rant. See, I'm gonna rant. You are, you're just jumping, you're doing task avoidance again. You're just, she's like, no, I'm not gonna investigate and I'm just gonna nurture myself.

Interest and care. Yeah. I'm just gonna go straight to the self pampering. Thank you. Um, which is, uh, also, uh, A task. Avoidance. Avoidance, yes. I'm gonna go get a massage or take a bubble bath or whatever instead of doing this.

[00:15:06] Jess: All right, so let's go back to rain. So the eyes investigate, right? Why do I feel this way?

Yeah, right. Why am I avoiding this? What is going on with me? What is this big emotion that I'm having?

[00:15:16] Randi: Yeah. And then you can nurture yourself. Then

[00:15:19] Jess: you can nurture yourself, because part of this is understanding why you feel this way. Yeah. That's funny. I wanna. Yeah. Okay. And so once you can figure all of that out, the next thing is using smart goals.

Mm-hmm. , I always teach smart goals in therapy as well. SMART stands for specific, measurable, attainable, relevant, and timebound.

[00:15:40] Randi: And I think Timebound is important to note, especially with ADHD because we can have time blindness.

[00:15:46] Jess: Oh yeah. Oh yeah. So let's go through what does specific mean.

[00:15:49] Randi: So, uh, for smart specific means, any goal you set needs to be very clear cut, very concise, very precise. You need to be basically black and white with yourself. You don't wanna set. Some like lofty goal mm-hmm. that is not attainable. You don't know how to achieve. Um, you need to be able to define it and know that you can achieve it. Yeah.

So it's not like I'm gonna go to France. And make, you know, a special French pastry one day, like, no. Let's say I'm gonna go to the store and pick up some ingredients to teach myself how to make this one specific French pastry. Okay, let's break it down so that it's a small, achievable. Understandable goal for yourself that you can actually like move through, and then you wanna be able to measure that. And that is, you need to have specific parameters for it. So maybe like, um,

[00:16:49] Jess: well, it's like how do you monitor your goals? How do you know? Right. Let's do weight loss. Right. Okay. I'm gonna lose a hundred pounds. . Right. Okay. Well, how, how are you going to do that?

[00:16:57] Randi: Yeah. So how is, how are you gonna measure that you're doing that and achieving it?

[00:17:00] Jess: Right. And achieve it is, I'm going to aim for one pound a week. Mm-hmm. , this is how I'm going to do it. Yeah. Right. And so it's having it very measurable so that way when you, you can look at it and say, how, how am I doing with this? Right. Right. And it can be anything, even if it is going to France to make that pastry.

[00:17:16] Randi: Right. How am I gonna get there? But it's like, Steps, you know that. And is this, can you financially, like really you need to like break it down. Will I be able to do this? Okay, maybe you can make that goal like a five year goal or things like that. Mm-hmm. , if you wanna measure it in that timeframe too, you know? S

o make sure that you have those steps and it needs to be attainable, which that means it needs to be realistic because why are you gonna set yourself up for failure? By making goals that you might never be able to achieve, that's gonna create a stress cycle.

[00:17:46] Jess: Right? Like if I have no desire to go to France and make a pastry cuz I can't cook, then why would I tell myself I'm gonna go do that?

Yeah. The other thing is making it relevant. Mm-hmm. , and that's huge for a D H D. Make it so it's, it works for what you are doing. Yeah. Because so many times we're like, you know, I think I'm gonna work on this. And you're like, why? That has nothing to do with what we're doing right

[00:18:07] Randi: now. Yeah. Like, what's the focus?

What is this gonna help you achieve? Mm-hmm. , like kind of like, what's the end goal of this? And then circle that back into the time bound. And so you need to have a also realistic timeframe.

[00:18:20] Jess: Right. And, and being kind to yourself about that timeframe. Mm-hmm. , this might take, you know, we'll go back to that five years.

Right, right. It might be every year we look at it, how are we doing towards our goal. Mm-hmm. . Right. It could be something that's very, you know, it's gonna keep us on track and motivated, but be real. Yes. You know, I'm not going to lose a hundred pounds in a month.

[00:18:39] Randi: Right. That's, yeah, that's what I was gonna say too, like, sometimes we can have like these goals and if we don't have a timeframe or all these smart goals going along with it.

How are we gonna get there? Right. You know, and like you said, like you might say like, I'm gonna lose it in six months. And it's like, is that realistic? Is that the normal? Probably not. So it's like, let's be kind to ourselves and give ourselves, , I would say to myself, okay, well it took me 20 years to gain this weight.

Mm-hmm. . So it might take me, you know, 10 years to. Relearn, you know, how to be healthy and like set a new cycle and lose, you know, weight and things like that. So it's like being realistic in that.

[00:19:14] Jess: Being realistic. I think my favorite out of these three though, is really chunking. Yes. That's, that's what I do most of the time.

Mm-hmm. is, is chunking,

[00:19:23] Randi: I think cuz it's not like the goals and stuff I, I. I'm very big on goals, but it can be another huge, like burden, almost like a task that you need to complete. And so it's like it's sometimes it's hard to sit down and do that. So I like chunking too.

[00:19:37] Jess: It is. It is for me. And so chunking is basically taking a large complex task and breaking it down into smaller pieces or chunks.

Mm-hmm. really easy and they should be small and specific. If you're going to do a trust now for you and your. You have to break it down,

[00:19:54] Randi: right? , okay, so I need to call like an attorney. Okay. , I need to research this. Like I need to do this, like you said, like breaking it down into more manageable tasks.

Mm-hmm. so that it's not so overwhelming. And this is what I do with things that I like to avoid too. Like majorly like finances or like taxes. Mm-hmm. or things like that. Like, okay, I'll call the tax person today. Like, okay, like, and next week, like, I'll sit down and go over the numbers for this month, you know, and things like that. So that it. I get to the point where I've avoided it so long and then there's like this panic to do it

[00:20:25] Jess: cleaning the bathroom. Mm-hmm. , right? If I say I'm gonna clean the bathroom, you know, what does that mean? Okay. We're going to empty out the trashcan, right? We're gonna take, we're gonna everything off the counters.

[00:20:36] Randi: Yeah. I'm gonna wipe down the counter, then I'm gonna wipe down the mirror. I'm gonna scrub the toilet. Sometimes we need to break it down into those things, especially if we are having an episode. If. Depressed. If we're anxious, if we're in an A D H D, you know, cycle or whatever like that. If you're a manic or anything like this, you can apply it.

Like, okay, I just need to take like one breath at a time, one step at a time, one task at a time.

[00:21:04] Jess: One of the things I like to do, and that I teach with my clients too, is I call it a brain dump. I don't know officially what it is. Mm-hmm. . Um, but it really takes the idea of chunking down. Yeah. Um, is really, like for ADHD for me, I have these things that float around in my brain.

Oh. So I put 'em on a piece of paper. I put 'em on a notepad. Yeah. There is no organization. It is not pretty. No. It's just my brain on a p a pad of paper. And then from there is when I will start breaking that down and chunking it down. Mm-hmm. , because some of those things are big. Yes. Right. And they may take me a while to do.

And so if I can chunk it, I can feel. This is probably my progressivity, but I can feel that I am getting things done and I can feel like I am on top of it.

[00:21:48] Randi: I think that this is great. I've been teaching myself this too on the business side and you know, personal life too, is that I think I was talking to you about too, about reading like the second brain book, and it's the same thing because this applies to a lot of like CEOs and like magnets and like billionaires and stuff and creative types and people.

Often who are adhd like this, you have so many ideas and they're all over the place and , , we love to research and we mm-hmm. and there's so much information out there now too. It can be so overwhelming with the internet and all the sources that we have and it's. Kind of like same thing, like putting this kind of all into a huge brain dump and then piecing it out or letting things go, or being , okay, this is important.

I should keep this. And so I have a major kind of second brain spreadsheet where I keep like all my information and stuff like that.

[00:22:41] Jess: Way more organized than I can be. Well, I can, I can just write it down on a pad of paper.

[00:22:44] Randi: Well, I do that. But he was saying like, it's very typical the guy who wrote the book, you know about having, like we have all these different.

To take notes, on paper digitally, in a spreadsheet, , text messages, whatever. I have 50,000 notebooks too, but it's trying to teach ourselves to narrow the focus. Mm-hmm. so we do have it in one place because we spend so much time. Looking for information That's true.

And which like I was talking about, like the emails. Mm-hmm. and like how it takes, they were saying like probably like at least six hours a week, people at work are looking for information to help them so you're not being as productive as you could be. , if you learned how to kind of source it all together.

And with adhd, that's very hard because we are not good sourcers .

[00:23:30] Jess: Right? Or we get stuck in the rabbit holes where you're like, I'm gonna research this next thing, you know? Mm-hmm. , it's three hours later because of time blindness. Right. And now we're like, you know, learning about something new that had nothing to do with what we, with their original thought.

So, but yeah, brain dumps I find that's what I teach a lot of times. Mm-hmm. is so it doesn't swirl in your brain anymore.

[00:23:49] Randi: Yeah. Getting it in the black and white on the paper and stuff too. Mm-hmm. . And they say that too about goals too. Like if you write it down and you see it in black and white, sometimes it helps you like achieve them and visualize them and move forward.

[00:24:01] Jess: Right, and, and there is something about writing it versus just sticking it in my phone. Mm-hmm. . Right? If I hand write it, I can remember that I did that. If I stick it in my phone, I have no idea where I put it. I have nothing. Yes. And then I'm looking through Randy's text messages, seeing if it's somewhere in

[00:24:15] Randi: there.

Yeah. And I'm very much like I have to hand write everything over and over again. I think that's another thing with like ADHD is like, , getting it out of your head onto the paper and then like reiterating it again. Mm-hmm. , like you're writing it out again, so you're like enforcing it. So these are just some tools that we use to help move forward and not avoid all the major life tasks that we need to do.

[00:24:40] Jess: And I'll put these up. We'll, we, we can go ahead and put up a couple of these different ones. Yeah. So people will have smart goals, have a spreadsheet for it, or sheet for. They can decide if they can do rain. Yeah. I mean these are And chunking out. Yeah. I mean these are just really good ways to keep you on track.

Yeah. Especially with the new year

[00:24:56] Randi: coming and keep them in your toolbox. Yeah. For the upcoming year and test out, see what works for you, what doesn't work. We're not saying this is all like trial and error with everything you need to. See what works for your brain and your life and the way that you move through things.

And there's nothing wrong with trying new things, Nope. Like this. And there's nothing wrong with tossing it out if it doesn't work for you,

[00:25:17] Jess: or just taking bits and pieces of what does work for you as well. Yeah.

[00:25:21] Randi: So, yeah, I'm making your own, , kind of thing. Maybe, , only one of these sections works for you.

That's fine. That's what we're talking about here, is like, you don't need to fit into a box. Nope. You know, you can use different types of tools. You can make it work for you. Don't be afraid to try those things and step outside of the box.

[00:25:38] Jess: Exactly. Exactly. All right. Have a great week. We will see you guys next week.

[00:25:43] Randi: Yeah, we will, uh, talk to you guys next Wednesday. Bye. 1, 2, 3, 4. Thanks for listening and normalizing mental health with us.

[00:25:52] Jess: Don't forget to check out our free resources and favorites on our website, unapologetically,,

[00:25:58] Randi: like and share this episode, and tune in next week.


Visit our Fav Sh*t  for all the books and info mentioned on the podcast.

Get updates with our Newsletter

You can ask your own questions by going to our form and submit your question (anonymously is totally an option) about women’s mental health.

If you’re looking for a therapist in your area, check out the directory at talk space or head space

Try Headspace For Free

Sign Up Today! Get $100 off your first month with code SPACE at!

Where to Find Us

Instagram The hashtag for the podcast is #RandiJessRealAF

Facebook Randi + Jess

Stay Connected

Is there a topic you’d like covered on the podcast? Submit it at


Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

Episode 21 – ADHD Task Avoidance and Procrastivity